Complaining!

I have been encountering a ton of this on facebook lately and thought it was time for me to come clean.

I cannot stand the way us Christians (particularly women) feel it's okay to post complaints on facebook in well disguised forms. If we believe God is always at work, we should not complain - the bible commands it! Philippians 2:14-15 - it ruins our testimony!!! And facebook is a prime place for others to gain opinions from.

I'm trying to be gracious, and assume that many who are complaining do not realize what they are saying. Here are some examples of what I think qualify as complaints:

- "Dear (insert whatever, whoever), you are making me miserable, please stop! Me."
- "Today has been awful - thinking positive and hoping tomorrow is better."
- "Why does life always have to be this way?" Or, anything referring to situations continually being bad or simply not what they prefer.
- Pretty much any post with an "ugh", "sigh", "err" or a generally negative tone.

Maybe the second one there has some of you thinking I'm being a little harsh. But let me explain. Simply hoping for better circumstances or saying "but Praise God" doesn't allow you to complain about other things! Just by saying "but God's in control" does not make it okay to spill all your discontents or vices. Does that make sense?

If we really believe that God is good and gracious, and if we are truly seeking His will (not our own) then it really becomes difficult to be an authority on your personal circumstances enough to say that they are bad. God knows what they are, and I'm sure they could be a TON worse - especially if you are living in America. Let me offer some hopefully helpful suggestions.

Most of our attitude (and many of our negative emotions) come from they way we are thinking and what we are thinking about. Philippians 4:8 encourages us "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Consider how your situation is good - some days, I REALLY struggle with this. But, we have a solid eternal hope that will make having a grateful heart and mouth full of praise on these bad days worthwhile. Here are some alternative wordings for facebook posts - to keep you positive, remembering God is taking care of you, and to keep your tongue/fingers on the keyboard from complaining to others.

-"Dear unnamed bad situation today, sorry that I caved in and got upset. I know you are only a circumstance and that the Lord prevails! Me." (the unnamed is important! Don't let yourself cave into the pressure of speaking your grievances!!) Proverbs 12:16 - don't be a fool!!
- "Today was not what I planned - wondering what God is showing me and trying to not miss out on His blessings!"
- "My life is not what I planned. I desire to know that God has been and will to continue planning it and hope to trust Him more as my life goes on."
- Speak praises, stating that God is in control, that His purposes are good, that you desire to know Him, that you desire to trust Him more.

If you have been guilty of complaining (as I am also) I hope that this is not a downer for you, but a reminder that what we speak is who we are! Jesus says in Mark 7:14b-15 "Hear me, all of you, and understand: There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him." It's what we speak and what we do and how we treat others that determines if we are "defiled." Yes, we have all been defiled, we are all sinners, but we are to walk in freedom from sin now! No longer held to the defilement our flesh offers, but to walk in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and SELF-CONTROL. His Holy Spirit can make it happen!

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. It seems that our culture has definitely changed the meaning of "complaining" or "grumbling" but I hope to encourage you to not succumb to it! God has such a gift of contentment and joy to offer us when we commit to not speaking words of disgrace and complaint. And He is more than willing to help us make it happen - it will glorify Him and give us an eternal reward. Plus, I bet you will be smiling a lot more because of it too! Please, either email me, facebook me or leave a comment letting me know your ideas, convictions, questions, whatever! Heck, I'll even take criticisms ;) Thanks for reading!

Learning.

Becoming a parent forces you to learn more about God. We gain a deeper understanding of His love for us when we feel love for our children. We gain a deeper understanding of discipline, consequences and all of those matters while teaching our children. Today, I gained a new understanding for why God makes us wait. 

In two separate instances, I had to ask both of my children to wait for a minute - maybe, 30 seconds. One was while I was cleaning a table, getting ready to walk to a meeting downtown. I told Asher to wait because I did not have everything lined up yet that I wanted to take with me. It occurred to me, that maybe sometimes God has us waiting in a job, a house, a situation with friends or church until He has everything lined up just the way He wants. And the amazing thing is, we can know that it is for His perfect purpose, for our sanctification and His glory! Romans 8:28 "For all things work together for good, for those who love God and are called according to His purpose." Just like Asher did not know the details of why He needed to wait, we often do not know the details of why God is making us wait, but we have this amazing promise that we can cling to.

Then, after the meeting, I asked Cole to wait on the curb while I unlocked the van and opened the doors. He just stood there crying - I think he thought I was going to leave him there! It was darling. I felt so compassionate for him, being so earnest, wishing to come with me, fearful that he would be left alone. I swooped him up, kissed him and told him that I wouldn't leave him, I was just getting everything ready so we could go together. Again, same revelation about God preparing our way for us! How often I am worse than Cole!! I don't cry because I want to go with God, I cry because I want to do what I want to do - which is usually very selfish and fulfills desires that are totally worldly. Cole really wanted to be with me and was genuinely fearful.

The amazing thing is, we never have to doubt that God is going to take us with Him. And He prepares so much for us, more than I could ever write about. Ephesians 2:10 says "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." It is so comforting to know that when we are following God, He has already prepared the way for us. The details, the plan, the fruit - He's got it all taken care of! This takes such a burden off my shoulders. I often feel a weight of responsibility towards those I pray for or are involved with, but what I learned today gives me a new sense of freedom. I can relax, God has got it covered! I can make plans and pray and go about daily responsibilities knowing that God is working out the fruit in my life for His glory whether or not I fret, whether or not I see it, and that no matter what Satan tries, God can handle it! Does this make you as happy as it makes me??

I hope this is like a breath of fresh air for you. Don't spend time worrying about past decisions, future outcomes or the various possibilities in ministry! Spend time praying, seeking the Lord, finding in His word what He says about who you are to be and what His word says about who He is. God will work out the details more perfectly than you can ever plan. You will still have to do the walking (and often, lots of planning & arranging), but He will do all the guiding & piecing things together in His PERFECT timing, in His PERFECT way - we might as well put a smile on our face and enjoy it!!! And we can enjoy it to the full, trusting that no matter what, His glory will be revealed. 

Short Video

I had seen this video being posted over and over again on facebook.com but only had the time to view it today. I highly recommend taking a couple minutes and watching it, then really taking some time to think about it. Here it is...




The thing that really got me, was him talking about this life being all there is. I think this is where Americans differ so much from much of the world - for the most part, life is easy for the majority of Americans... we don't need anything else because life is good! But I wonder, does people who actually think that way ever think about other people around the world? Would they tell a person in Ethiopia who was born with AIDS b/c their mother had an injection for polio that was not sterilized after been given to 50+ people that this life is all there is? I certainly hope not. If this life is all there is, why do anything except make your life better? And what kind of despair does this give to those who are completely ill and poverty stricken? I would despair thinking this life was all there was, even with my easy circumstances.

My intention with bringing this up is just to get us thinking. Do you really believe that this life is all there is? Do you believe that God has an eternal plan for you? If so, do you believe it enough to put aside your selfish ambition?? I really don't want to be the type of person who says "I hope in God" yet continually live in a way that is banking on what I can achieve for myself here on earth. If I know God has an eternal purpose that is beyond what I can ever think or imagine, then I must be willing to give up everything I can here to achieve more glory for Christ. Because is there anything else more important to do?

Fast February.

Sorry, I'm not keeping up on this very well. And I have to admit, it's been my own fault. Yes, I have been crazy busy (you can read about it on my other blog) but I also have no excuse if I truly feel this is an area in my life that God has called me to. If He's called me to it, He'll give me the energy and strength to do it!

Still, right now I'm not posting a huge, preachy, scripture-based concept. Just a small thought. One that I am often engrossed with and spend many hours debating about in my head. If we are Christians, how can we be so incredibly all about ourselves so often? Yes, we are to care for our family, but does that mean that is what we spend ALL our time doing? Isn't it good for our children to see us taking time to serve God first and then serve them? After all, we should introduce the idea spoken about in Matthew 5 about putting others before ourselves. Or better yet, can't we take our children with us while serving or include them in areas of service? This "family-centered" lifestyle is very much the "Christian" thing to do in America these days... it's even the non-Christian way of life too... family first. But the bible doesn't ever say family first, it says Jesus' kingdom & work first, then family. I really believe that when you dedicate your time to serving the Lord (which is often at home first) He will bless your endeavors to serve your family. I'm not saying let your kids go hungry while you read your bible... I'm saying think twice and pray often before assuming that spending all your time at home and making your home a nest is the exact thing God wants you to do.

Really, I just look at missionaries and people actively involved with spreading the gospel, attending to the poor and afflicted, and I just don't understand why so many of us American church-goers are not involved in any of it. Do any of us really want to know why? Do we even take 10 minutes a month to think about how this can be happening?

Just food for thought, very important though for any of us claiming to serve Jesus.

Contentment.

I've been reading this book called "Future Grace" by John Piper and I'm loving it. It's all about trusting in God's promises and how this is what drives us to continue serving the Lord. It also goes into some deeper theological issues that I am not ready to handle yet... I'm beginning to understand them better, but not quite ready to write about them or explain them - guess you'll have to keep coming back and reading my blog ;)

So, this book is divided into 31 chapters. He did this to help keep the reader immersed in this subject for a more extended amount of time, instead of letting the reader read, and be done with the entire book in a day or two. I must admit, I've really enjoyed it! It's great to have some continuity in my reading and it's been good to have along with my bible reading... I'm pretty sure I'm going to buy this book for many of my friends and family members... I might even do a giveaway soon!

Anyway, my point is on this subject of contentment. I read in one of the recent chapters about discontentment, or rather, covetousness, being one of the deepest issues a believer has to come to terms with - or rather, an issue they have to allow God to work out in each of us. The root of the issue is this - all covetousness is an unbelief in the future grace of God. At first I thought "Really?" but the more I think about it and the more I read, the more I see this to be true.

If we are discontent, we are wishing that we had more of something the world can offer - more of what someone else has got. We are letting our desire for earthly pleasures and gains rule over our faith in the provisions that God has made for us and will make for us. We are saying "What I could have here on earth is better than what I could have in God." Am I wrong? Here is what Paul says to Timothy about this issue...

"Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into this world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs."
1 Timothy 6:6-10

Wanting any earthly possession will get us nowhere. And if we are not careful, we can foster this desire for stuff and money and allow it to lead us away from the faith, ruining our eternity. And if you're wondering... no, I do not believe the "once saved, always saved" mentality to be biblical... there are too many warnings about keeping the faith, enduring to the end, not wandering away... but this is one of those heavy, theological issues I will likely deal with later in the year.

What I want to hash out is this issue of discontentment. Discontentment shows us that we really don't believe God's good intentions for His followers. If I believed 100% that all of my circumstances were ultimately going to lead me to the most important thing to ever happen in my life, why would I have any reason to not be filled with joy? If I truly understood, that even in difficulty, God was working out my circumstances to be for my own benefit both here on earth and in eternity, wouldn't I be foolish to be anxious or worried or upset? But isn't this the same promise we are given if we keep the faith and remain true to the Lord? God has given us so many promises - some conditional (another issue I'll tackle later) and some with the only requirement being that we turn to Him. But if you call yourself a Christian, there is not one good reason for you to ever be discontent - I mean it! God has made every provision for you to have a blessed eternity with Him. And not only that, He continues to make earthly provisions for you to be comfortable, have food, clothing, enjoy relationships... there are endless lists.

In light of all this, I would encourage of you Christian readers to take a look at your life and ask God to reveal areas of discontentment. Because while some small areas may not lead to flagrant sin - such as murder or theft or sexual immorality - any area of discontentment has the potential to. And why risk it? Especially when we can be so blessed with a joy and contentment that can make a difference in so many lives around us. Especially since when we are content with where God has us, we will see Him and His purposes more clearly, fueling our passion for Him and filling our hearts so we will never be lacking.

Enjoy a few verses giving us encouragement for the things God has promised to those who follow Him.

"And we know that all things work together for good, for those who love God, for those that are called according to His purpose."
Romans 8:28

"What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all, how will He not also with Him graciously give us all things?"
Romans 8:32

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, it will be opened. Or which of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him?"
Matthew 7:7-11

"if any of you lack wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."
James 1:5-8 -
This one is a good example of a conditional promise - God will give wisdom to anyone who asks, supposing that he asks in complete faith that God is willing and able to provide.

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
1 John 1:9


Thinking.

Sometimes, I read something or hear something that really hits me. Today, I read a section from the Book Radical by David Platt. He was explaining that Jesus didn't sweat blood b/c He was afraid of torture and death... this something I hadn't even thought about... many preachers have simply taught that Christ was scared of the physical pain He knew He would be enduring. Anyway, Platt explains that many a martyr have gone to their torturous death with joy and singing, very different from the idea we are given about Jesus before His death. Jesus didn't die just because He loved us and He wasn't fearful of physical death - Jesus knew the truth about what it would be like to endure the massive amount of God's wrath that was due the history of man... that's what made Him sweat blood.

This was almost shocking when I read it. Really? No one has ever mentioned that before in my presence! I have been going to church since I can remember, been to many Christian camps, went to a Christian University and have attended several bible teaching churches. But for some reason, this never comes up. Platt guesses some of that reasoning is because we like the loving picture of God, who sent his Son to physically die for us, more than we desire to know the True God, who took out the wrath of all of mankind on His only Son, who was perfectly righteous in all ways. This thought has my head spinning, and I think it will continue spinning for a while. I hope to grasp this concept more this year... I think if all Christians did, we would think a lot less about our physical life and a lot more about what Jesus was really dying for. 

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